Response to Hank Green’s Rant on Books

I've been meaning to make a video response to Hank Green's rant on books since the day he uploaded it. But, alas, my house is cold, and I cannot be bothered to leave the comfort of my pajama pants. Also, my bookshelf is right in front of a window and does not lend itself to vlogging. So, now I have a blog. Hellooooooo, Internet.

1. Hank's complaint: spoilers on the back of books. My complaint: a photo of the author instead of a synopsis.

Picture this: while browsing in a bookstore, you see a book that looks interesting. You pick it up and flip it over to read the back and to find out what it's about, only to be greeted by an author's face and nothing else. What do you do? Well, if you're me, you throw that book right back on the display you found it on, and don't give it a second thought. Authors, you are lovely people, and I'd love to see your face, but your face does NOT tell me what the book is about. I don't want to have to open up the book and read the inside flap to figure it out.

2. Hank's comment: if the book is part of a series, tell us. Put a little number on the bottom. My comment: what he said.

I'm talking to YOU, Princess Diaries series. There are ten of you and every single title has the word "Princess" in it... Why did you make it so hard to buy the right one? I know one of the mass market versions used to have the numbers on them... What happened to that? Hmmm?



3. Hank's complaint: Don't lie to me. Me: I have a story...

Behold: the back cover of #32 of the Sabrina the Teenage Witch series, Reality Check. In the second paragraph, you'll see one of problems listed is "Val resigns as school newspaper editor." However, if you actually read the book, she doesn't. That never happens, and it's interesting that of all the Sabrina books that could have had an error on the back cover, it happened to the book titled "Reality Check."

I have so many questions about how that mistake came to be...



My additional complaints:

1. When you re-release books, don't shove all the sequels together with the first book in one volume. Christopher Pike is my favorite author, and I want everyone to read his books, but Remember Me was better than Remember Me 2 and 3. (The sequels don't need to be read at all, really. You can and probably should stop after you read the first one.) If you republish them all together, I can't recommend them.

2. Put the main character's name in the summary somewhere. I read 915 books last year. I'll be halfway through a book, when I realize I don't know what the main character's name is. Make it easy for me to  find while I'm trying to review it.

3. Book texture. Have you ever picked up a book with a cover that felt like chalkboard? Well, it is deeply unpleasant. If you want physical books to continue to sell, maybe you should pay attention to how they feel when you're holding them.